A friend of mine, Dave Cullen had several dreams come true this week including taping the Oprah show.  He is on a media tour as Cullen is the author of the book Columbine, and he is considered a leading authority on the tragic event which occurred ten years ago April 20.

I was fortunate to obtain an early draft of the book last year as Cullen was editing the final copy.  The book is compelling, a real page turner on many levels.  It moves and disturbs you simultaneously.  Cullen brilliantly weaves a series of story lines together to create a holistic view.  Cullen’s writing does not comfort as much as it explains the logic behind otherwise illogical, unfathomable behavior.  The question Cullen raises in his depiction of the killers is illogical to whom?  Random acts of violence are illogical to you and me, but to a psychopath (a clinical diagnosis of Eric Harris) that is another story.

As then President Bill Clinton said, “The tragedy has pierced the hearts of all Americans.”  While Columbine was not the first school shooting in history, it was the most profound.  Partially because it happened in real time.  People around the world watched the events live as the unfolded on television.  These images altered the perception of student and school safety, and changed the way educators lead.

As Cullen talks about during his media blitz, no one is immune to random acts of violence.  We live with risk regardless of our address.  However, Columbine illustrated the need to listen and observe to those directly in our purview.  To say you can prepare for a tragedy like Columbine is inauthentic and insulting.  However, educational leaders have recognized the importance of training teachers and administrators to understand the logic behind student behavior.

There is a hypothesis I took on during my diversity and inclusion work for a large, global bank there is always a logic behind someone’s behavior.  People for the most part don’t intentionally want to drive you crazy although sometimes that is the unintended consequence.  They are simply doing the best they can with the data they have.

This may seem like a huge leap from the events at Columbine, but the importance of seeing and understanding another has taken a focal point in many developmental programs for educators.  I don’t mean to be glib.  This is certainly not the case across the board, but Columbine created greater awareness of the significance of listening particularly to those not being heard.  Peter Senge’s opening chapter of his seminal book on management The Fifth Discpline is “I See You.”  Senge talks about how language brings another into existence in a south African tribe.  The greeting for hello translated literally means I see you, and without that language it is if the person is not there.

The economic uncertainty combined with the stacking of work to those who remain can leave people with an experience of not being heard.  Each of us has a choice when working with others.  We can choose to be curious about the logic behind another’s behavior, or we can choose to not see them.  There is no certainty either way.  Taking time to reflect on tragedies like Columbine is never easy.  The extent to which it allows us to access parts of ourselves and share those parts with others makes something possible not possible without the reflection.  The choice is ours to make.